The End and The Beginning...

The birth of Kaitlyn has brought us to the end of this wonderful journey and into an entirely new world... Motherhood!

We would like to thank all of you who followed us throughout our pregnancy and commented along the way. I'd like to welcome you to visit us at our new diary. We started an online journal of our new life with Kaitlyn and would love to have you join us there and hear your comments.

Please check the "Links" section on the right for the new journal!

My Miracle Has Happened!!

On Friday June 10th we spoke to Dr Basso and she told us to come in the office on Monday and that we would be doing our c-section that evening. We went to the office in the morning to see the Dr, we got everything set up for the C-setion at 5pm that evening. We were told to be at the hospital at 3pm to get paperwork done and be prepped for surgery. Things took a little longer than expected and another woman ended up having her baby just before we were supposed to go in the OR. We ended up being delayed just a bit.

Anyway, in the prep room they monitored the baby, gave me an IV with fluids and put in a catheter. I was VERY upset and crying when they did the catheter, not only because they hurt me but because I felt so vulnerable and neither of the nurses talked to ME while doing the procedure. It would have been nice to have them talk to me and explain everything they were doing. That was very hard to cope with and I just cried. I'm glad Jon was there to support me. When they took me in the OR room they told Jon to wait in the prep room until they were ready for him to join us. That was hard for me because I was already freaked out about everything going on as it was. They had to get my spinal done and everything and get all set up before they brought him in. Anyway, I ended up having a spinal for anesthetic, which the woman had a hard time doing (because of my weight I'm assuming) and she had to stick me about 5 times to get it in there right. Getting the spinal was painful... not necessarily the sticking of the needles, but when the stuff was put in my back it was a horrible, instant pressure down my spine from the middle of my back down and out across my hips. It was a feeling I have never felt before and I couldn't possibly explain it well enough for anyone to understand how it feels. My chest, butt and legs got tingly and numb almost instantly so they were ready to get things started.

They laid me on the table and put up the sheet... the anesthesiologist told me to tell her if I started to feel sick and she would give me medicine to help. Well just as she said it, I said.... "I'm feeling sick." She put a towel next to my head incase I threw up and well as much as my body wanted to, I was numb from the chest down so I didnt have the muscle control to actually do it! It was a weird feeling as well. Now it was weird trying to breathe, I was so numb that I had to take deep breaths to even realize I was breathing! I also remember feeling like I was floating. It felt like my head and shoulders were laying on the table and that everything below that was hovering just above the table. Trying to talk to my hubby felt weird too because you really have to concentrate when most of your body is pretty much paralyzed. Anyway, I did not feel ANYthing during the surgery, no pressure, no nothing. The only thing I felt was kind of a rocking/shaking feeling as they were moving my body around to get to the baby.

Once they started, the baby was out within about 5 mins or so, she was born at 7:13pm. We did hear that the cord was around her neck, but the Dr's sounded like it was no big deal and we weren't worried at all. Now, waiting to hear the baby make a sound and cry felt like a lifetime, when in reality it was about 15 seconds I think!! She had the most beautiful tiny cry. She was squeaking like a little squeaker toy too and her cry was so cute and quiet. I remember just getting a huge feeling of relief and feeling so incredibly happy. I think I cried or wanted to but I could barely feel anything at that point! Jon got to see them working at cleaning her off and even got to go over and touch her hand and I think he instantly fell in love with her! The Doctors were finishing me up and sewing me back up and they finished getting baby wiped off and were going to take her in the other room to bathe her and get her weights and measurements. Jon went with the baby and after I was finished I was sent down to recovery.

Normally the recovery stay is about 45 mins while they get you on some pain meds and get you comfortable enough to be taken back up to your post partum room. Well it took them three hours to get enough pain killers into me to make me comfortable. Finally I was able to go to my room where Jon and Kaitlyn were there waiting for me. Before this time I had only seen her for 3 seconds before they took her to clean her and everything. I kissed her on the forehead and didnt see her again for 3 hours!!!

Kaitlyn was born on Monday June 13, 2005
at 7:13pm she was 6lbs 12oz and 19 inches long

A Light at the End of the Tunnel!!

Well I spoke to both my OB Dr and my psychiatrist. We have come up with an agreement and Dr Basso is more than willing to do a C-Section to ensure my mental well being. We're extremely happy about that and it feels very good to know that we are cared about.

Dr Basso called us yesterday evening and told us there was no problem with doing the C-Section. She asked us to come in to the office first thing Monday morning and then she would probably be sending us over to the hospital and we would just have the baby that day. She said that we are more than far enough along and everything should work out fine.

So it looks like this is our last weekend as a couple and Monday starts our life as a family!! Jon and I are both very excited!! It doesnt really seem real yet and I dont think it will until she is in my arms and really here. Anyway, I will be in the hospital until Thursday (or Friday) with the baby and Jon is going to keep working while the baby and I are there getting the help we need from the nurses. He is going to take off work from June 20th until July 1st so he can be home with me and the baby when we will need him most.

I have been in so much pain the last few days that I haven't been able to do the things around the house that I would have liked. I haven't even been able to clean and organize. It's very frustrating but I am really depending on Jon to get a lot of stuff done for us. The bathroom needs to be cleaned and the kitchen and then the living room needs to be picked up and organized. I hope he can do it before next weekend when we bring the baby home and when Jon's mom and sisters come visit.

We can't wait to meet the baby, so here's to our soon to be family of three!! :)

Cried so Hard...

Last night I cried and cried and could hardly stop because I was in so much pain. I was getting contractions all day yesterday but none to go to the hospital about. I believe that the contractions were pushing her down further into my pelvic bone and thats why I'm in so much pain. I hurt so bad I can barely walk, couldnt move in bed, couldnt get out of bed, couldnt even get off the couch. I feel incredibly helpless and like an invilid. In the middle of the night I was in so much pain trying to turn over and getting up to go to the bathroom was the worst. Jon has been great about helping me and even told me I should have woke him up in the middle of the night to help me... but I'm too stubborn, I hate feeling like I cant do anything for myself... I hate feeling so out of control of myself. I just can't believe how much it hurts. I need to make sure to say, I know it's all worth it and soon I'll be holding my little girl and none of this will matter but it still hurts so bad. Not only am I physically in pain, I'm going through a lot emotionally and... well... I guess I hope this means the end is near.

37 Weeks and Wondering Where to Go from Here...

We had our 37 week appointment today and everything was fine and dandy. Weight still just about the same, my blood pressure was 120/76 (not sure thats right, but thats what the nurse said it was) and baby's heartrate sounded good and strong as usual! Thats really all that happened at the appointment today though so now we wait to see where we go from here.

I had an appointment with my psychiatrist yesterday afternoon and we talked about the type of delivery I was confortable with. I have always wanted a C-section since I thought about having children. I am extremely uncomfortable with having a vaginal delivery and it has to do with a trauma I experienced as a young child. I'm not going to get into it, but my Dr feels that I could have a psychiatric break down if I were to go through a vaginal delivery as it would flare up post traumatic stress disorder. He wrote a letter to my OB Dr to explain to them that he felt an alternative delivery would be optimal. I gave the letter to Dr. Basso because I feel she cares about us and is considerate of my well being. So now we sit and wait and hope to hear what we are going to do. I just gave her the letter today and I'm hoping she is willing to work something out with me. I'm sure she will call my psychiatrist to get a better understanding of the situation and then we will discuss what will happen.

I know this update is very vague but the only thing that is important is that in the next few days we could be deciding on a date to have a C-Section. If we don't, I'm not sure what I am going to do... I'm not mentally capable of delivering this baby vaginally...

36 Week Update

Well, we had our Dr appointment yesterday and basically it's just a waiting game now. We did get an ultrasound and found out that the baby is aprox. 6lbs 10oz right now and could gain about 1oz per day until she is born. In other words, she has the potential of being between 8 1/2 and 9lbs! AHHH!!! She needs to come out NOW! :)

Everything else is going well too, my weight... still the same. I'm at the same weight as I was before I was pregnant! Good for me, just means when the baby does come out I'll be losing about 15 pounds right away! :) My blood pressure was 130/80 so thats not bad. When we were in the hospital the other night it had gotten a little high, but what can you expect when I'm getting contractions. Baby's heart sounded great as well. She was moving around like the little worm-child she already is and her heartrate was 169. Nice and strong!

We did find out that she is head down, of course, and that she is facing my left hip. We did get a great picture of her face because of her position and I call her my little chipmunk because she has the cutest cheeks! She looks beautiful already and all I can see is the black and white fuzzy outline of her bones! She has a tiny nose though and ugh I'm just so excited to meet her. I wish she would just come out!!!

Well since we were in the hospital the other night the contractions have slowed and I am back to getting them every so often throughout the day. They have no pattern, some are a little stronger (ok, a lot stronger) than others but still just random. We took a walk last night, although not a far one because I hurt too much to walk that far, hoping that would kick us into Active labor. So far, nothing yet! I'm excited about her starting to come, but I could be in this early part of labor until her due date in 3 1/2 weeks!!

Well we will keep updating until she comes... hopefully it's sooner rather than later!! :)

Trial Run at the Hospital

Well just a quick update... we spent the night in the hospital last night... I started having contractions yesterday in the afternoon. I waited a couple hours before calling the Dr and tried drinking some water to see if it helped... it didnt. Jon went and grabbed dinner before we called and then we headed to the hospital at about 6:30pm. Anyway, spent the night there contracting fairly regularly, baby was high and we were 50% effaced and barely a fingertip dilated... this morning when the Dr came and checked, we were still contracting - a little slower I think and still 50% effaced but we had gotten to about 1cm and baby's head had come down too.

Anyway, they gave us the choice of staying in the hospital or going home to be comfortable until labor kicked in harder and we were further along. So we decided to come home! We will update as things progress and hopefully they will keep on progressing!!!

Come on baby!!! Come see mommy and daddy!!! :)